Mothers Day

Mothers Day is one of the hardest days of the year for me. For multiple reasons, but mostly because it feels like a slap in the face. Growing up my life goals all included being a mom. There was no backup plan, that was the only thing I could imagine myself doing. At 29 I find myself with no children or any hint of them in the future. My Ex-Husband and I suffered multiple miscarriages as well as dealing with infertility which was a strain on our already damaged marriage. I am haunted by those years and that emptiness in my life every time Mothers Day comes around. This year I worked late and came home very upset. All day long I saw mothers with their babies and not only felt that sadness but was also missing my mom. I came home to find Murphy is high spirits waiting very impatiently for me to hold and kiss him. I got Murphy to help fill a void in my life and give me a reason to come home at night. He might not be the baby I expected, but I don't doubt for a second that he was heaven sent. Happy Mothers day to all mothers out there. To  those with children in their arms, and those who are especially feeling the emptiness of theirs.

#MothersDay